Evidence-backed coach for compulsive porn users
Meet Iris. Built on the methods that actually work for compulsive porn use.
How it works
Iris is trained on the parts of CBT relapse-prevention1Marlatt & Gordon (1985). Map the chain that ends in use. Catch it earlier next time. Build forward rules that are specific and testable., ACT urge tolerance2Hayes, Strosahl & Wilson. Don't argue with the urge. Notice it, defuse the bargaining thought, ride the wave without obeying it., motivational interviewing3Miller & Rollnick. Reflect, don't lecture. Honour ambivalence instead of pushing abstinence onto someone still defending the behaviour., and urge surfing4Marlatt (2002). Urges are time-limited body events. They peak around 15 to 20 minutes and fall. Repeated practice weakens the urge-action link. that fit a five-minute WhatsApp exchange. None of the model is novel. The delivery is.
Catching the early links is easier than white-knuckling the last one. Iris is built to make the catch happen sooner each time.
The honest version
Loss of control
Repeated failed quits. Late-night spirals. The pattern keeps winning despite real effort to stop.
Quiet drag
Use isn't huge, but it doesn't fit who you want to be. The shame is bigger than the behaviour.
Stuck in the loop
Blockers, NoFap, willpower, all tried. Something keeps pulling you back in the same few hours.
State-aware coaching
Iris recognises the state you're in and runs a different playbook. Tap through the states below to see how the conversation actually changes.
Text the moment the pull starts. Iris keeps the target small and stays in the next few minutes with you. Conversation, not directives, for most urges.
What it sounds like
For most urges, talking is the work. Iris stays present, names the permission thought without arguing with it, and reaches for a directive only when conversation isn't holding. The opposite of a chatbot that fires a coping skill at you and disappears.
Memory with a job
Triggers, leak paths, the bargaining thoughts that keep showing up, what worked, what didn't. If a hotel room, an unblocked work laptop, or a familiar permission thought shows up twice, Iris stops treating it like a new problem.
Trust is the product
The field has a lot of noise: pseudoscience, shame engines, and ideology dressed as treatment. Iris is built to not be part of it.
Data and privacy
Iris needs enough context to be useful, but the data rules are deliberately tight: no selling, no advertising use, encrypted storage, deletion on demand, and zero access to anything on your phone besides the messages you send.
Read the full privacy policyMessages, profile facts, and phone number are never sold to third parties and never shared for advertising.
Conversation data is protected in transit and stored in encrypted databases with restricted operational access.
Delete your messages, profile, or account at any time. Your data is yours to keep or remove, your call.
No access to your browser, apps, photos, location, or device activity. Only the messages you send.
Pricing
Setup runs in WhatsApp. Once Iris is set up you'll get a link to subscribe. Billing and cancellation live on the website.
For context: a CBT therapist for this work is typically £60 to £100 a session, once a week. Iris is the in-the-moment piece, in your pocket, every day, for £6 a month. The two don't compete, they pair.
One plan
Free setup in WhatsApp. Cancel anytime.
Questions
It's for what clinicians now call compulsive sexual behaviour disorder (CSBD) or problematic pornography use. ICD-11 lists CSBD as an impulse-control disorder, not formally an addiction. Iris matches your language without endorsing one label. It works whether you have repeated loss of control, a quiet drag that doesn't fit your values, or anything in between.
CBT relapse-prevention for chain mapping and forward rules. ACT for urge tolerance and cognitive defusion. Motivational interviewing for the engagement layer. Marlatt's urge-surfing model for the 15 to 20 minute peak. None of this is novel. What's novel is delivering it at 11:47pm with the phone in your hand.
A blocker adds friction. Iris handles the moment when friction is not enough: the bargaining, the late-night state, the post-lapse spiral, and the plan for next time. Most people who quit use both.
No. Iris doesn't diagnose and doesn't push an identity onto you. The 'addict forever' frame is one model that helps some people; it's not universal truth and Iris doesn't impose it.
Streak culture is fine as motivation, but the identity collapse after a lapse is what kicks most people back into bingeing. Iris treats a lapse as data, not as starting from zero. The pattern hunt after a slip is the part that changes future behaviour.
No. It cannot see your browser, apps, photos, location, or device activity. It only knows what you text it.
The service needs your WhatsApp number to send messages, but the AI does not see it. Data is never sold, storage is encrypted, and you can delete your messages or your account at any time.
Iris isn't built for safety emergencies. If you're in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, please contact a crisis service directly (e.g. Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, 988 in the US).